Contemplation. Contemplating?

October 27, 2011 by  

As I sit here typing this, I realize how much of a horrible procrastinator I am. I think procrastination is a mental illness; a chemical reaction in the brain which occurs when a timeline begins to dwindle to its last few days. It’s horrible, really. It leaves you feeling like crap, but you consistently keep putting off whatever it is as it just makes sense. But, in truth, it makes no sense at all. Looking back at the few times I have recently procrastinated, the baggage just keeps on building up until you reach your breaking point, at which point you slowly have to pick up the fragmented pieces and glue them all together, somehow, in a matter of hours. Procastination, they really should figure out a cure for it. Maybe I need to take my vitamins more often. Maybe I just like the feeling of being weighed down by self loathing. All I know is, I am through with my relationship with procrastination. It’s like a piece of cake. It’s right there in front of you. Why not have it? Well, for one, you promised yourself you’d get back in to shape after eating every piece of cake that came your way without a care in the last year. Two, you had plans to go on a jog, and you know that if you eat this piece of cake, not only will you have to wait another hour until it settles in your stomach to ensure a successful workout, but it’ll be dark by that time, and you hate jogging at night. When is it time to ninja chop that piece of cake in the jugular and say “Damn you, you sweet, delectable spawn of Satan. I’ve had it with your decieving ways”? I think that day is today.

Procrastination numero uno: I haven’t vlogged in over a year. That is changing tomorrow. October 28, 2011. I convinced myself I stood alone in the world for not having an iPod to video random stuff like my face and fish and buildings, and you know what? I bought it, and haven’t picked it up for even the sheer enjoyment of music listening in almost a year. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? Is it because I sort of hate how long it takes me to piece together a vlog? In truth, I love it. It’s awesome. Nope, it might have to do with the fact that I continually find myself talking about nothing important. Regardless, that changes tomorrow. And, if I don’t stick to my word, I owe whoever reads this and comments first $20.

Procrastination numero deux: I bought two Crest White Strips packages, almost finished the first one, started the second package for whatever reason and didn’t finish that one either. Does this have to do with the fact that I hate the feeling of it on my teeth? Not really, it makes me feel like I have dentures which gives me an excuse to talk to my family in an 80-year-old dutchman accent for a half hour until I have to take them off. Or maybe, it has to do with the fact that I decided to do the whole two-a-day cycle, which is inconvenient as I always find myself wanting to devour apple sauce halfway through the second round. Enough with the excuses; that changes tomorrow. I want pearly whites when I open my mouth.

Procrastination numero trios: I have a hard time with sitting down and finishing anything that involves using my brain, i.e. writing a song, finishing a puzzle, etc. I have been working on a book for almost 5 years – which I will not name until it is finished (see what I’m doing? I’m pressuring myself to complete it)  – and in the last few weeks this surge of creative energy has come and gone through me, because when I go to write something in my shiny journal dedicated to this book, I write about 50 words, re-read it, then scrap it as it sounds derivitive or overly facetious. Well, I am setting up a plan for myself: Write 500 words a day; no revisions, no alterations. And, at the end of it all, once I have made it to the finish line, I can go rewriting-buckwild.

I am defeating this feebleness today and for always. Thank you Occupy Wall St. initiative which has spawned around the globe for planting that little seed in my head that it’s time to take action and make changes in my life for the better. It sure feels sweet to have that haze leave my head and show me the path to a better, more productive me.

Speaking of procastination, this blog is delayed, and I need to post the last few blogs I wrote for Youthink Magazine. The first blog is on an amazing awesome teen singer/songwriter named Kate Morgan, who chatted with me in the midst of her crazy awesome Canadian tour alongside Winnepeg pop artist James Struthers. The second blog came to fruition after I decided next year will be the year I will focus on touring to promote my debut album, Just Another Girl, and got to talk with Vancouver artist Christina Maria whos spent most of her time over the last year living in Zurich and touring around Europe. The third and final blog is on songwriting tips and advice featuring Nat Jay, whose songs have been featured on MTV, ABC, The CW, CTV, CBC and many more network television stations.

Thank you, once again, for reading til the end. I appreciate it. Feel free to send me a note or follow me on twitter (@alexandriasing) or become my friend on Facebook.

Au Revoir,

Alexandria

Comments

Feel free to leave a comment...
and oh, if you want a pic to show with your comment, go get a gravatar!